beautiful clear skies today… what a day to forget my handy carry camera! urrrgh!… i cld see the blue of the sky contrasting against white white fluffy clouds – this IS a rare sight where i live now, with the constant pollution problem escalating by the minute… anyway, i was savouring every visual moment as i rode home on the ferry… woooooooooof!
last nite was trying to the senses… sensory overload… no, it wasn’t the percussion concert i attended – that was fine, pretty good, i daresay… i always did enjoy percussion, but i dont hv a great sense of rhythm nor do i hv physical strength enough for this… so i m just an admirer… well, the concert went fine… but my companion was little miss smugget – yeah the one who thinks i made the greatest social gaff of my life by telling veronica the truth… perhaps she is right, but i m disappointed nevertheless at her utter lack of emotional and spiritual integrity – she’d rather lie in the face of someone she says she respects than to ‘lose face’ socially?… yep…
i crossed her out some time ago as a close friend, so why m i still so peeved by her little quirks? dunno… shd i blame it on the aspie slow processing speed for such things? late dinner after the concert was excruciating… she has NOTHING to talk abt other than her men – makes her out to be such a cheap desperado, which sadly she really is deep down inside, despite her very real talent and abilities… sigh… so she is super crazy abt a certain bambino that i kw… and it’s all super boring super irritating by now… then to add fuel to the crackling fire, she proceeded to launch into a long vehement criticism of the concert, the performer AND then abt the music discipline in general… i reminded her it takes years and years of training and dedication to reach any level of virtuosity at all, and she just scoffed and said, “exactly, i just don’t understand u musicians, why take so many years over some archaic technicalities? in art, we are more immediate and true to the moment…” THAT DID IT!!! this girl has GOTTA GO!!! i can appreciate ignorance if it is humble ignorance – nobody knows everything right? but i just cannot abide proud “i-know-it-ALL” vocal ignorance… no no no…
but i m proud of myself, i didnt explode… instead… i deftly but obviously enough changed the subject back to her beloved bambino and she took the hint (because she really isn’t ALL THAT stupid) and proceeded to bore me the rest of the evening with her musings… “he loves me, he loves me not” shite… but i finally drew the curtains and closed this ‘friendship’ … sorry i cannot take any more of this…
hey, i love and i do love deep… it is not true that ALL aspies are not interested in relationships – in fact, the deep loyal supportive loving relationships that i hv nurtured thru my life are the cornerstones to my existence… without them, i wld be a total wreck more terrible than the titanic… but to go on and on and on and on… a woman in her mid-30s, talented artist, established name in her field… ENOUGH ALREADY!!!!
yes i m impatient with this sort of mixture of puffed up ignorance and pathetic desperation… why do potentially lovely women carry diseases that make them such pariahs? sad…
sensory overload… i need rest… and distraction… help!
